Last night there was a storm here. Not a “storm” in the Florida caliber I’m used to, but definitely more of a storm than we usually get. It was rainy, and really windy. At a couple points during the night I woke up to the whipping of the wind outside our window. I love the sound of a storm, if I was smart I woulda been the dude who recorded it and made millions putting it out on a series of “Earth Sounds” cds. Anyway, ’round about 4:30am I woke again to the rain and wind and decided to put on my glasses and go check out what it looked like. I got a glass of water and went to the sliding glass door to look, but couldn’t see much so went back to bed. I was lying there, listening to the storm, and I started imagining that I was in a boat at sea. It was the old times, y’know? with wooden boats like in pirate and pilgrim movies. I was out on the ocean, on some cool journey to some far away place.
I used to know a guy who lived on a boat. When I was manager at the record store, he was a salesperson. One night he asked a couple of us guys to come back to his place and hang out. Man, that boat was so cool. It wasn’t very big, but it smelled all “boaty” like that stuff they treat wood with. In the cabin it had all the trappings of a little efficiency room: TV, fridge, microwave, stove, etc. It was really cool and all old-timey nautical decorated, and I just loved that boat smell. Maybe it was because that little self-contained cabin area tapped into my “enclosed space” fantasies, all womby and stuff. He just had it moored at this little marina, where he payed a docking fee and a hookup fee for electricity and sewage or whatever. I remember him saying that it wasn’t as cheap as I may have thought, but man did I dig that whole idea. You could pick up and leave whenever you wanted, go out for days, whatever. Awesome. We got tight on Jack that night and hung out above deck telling stories under the stars – it was totally awesome. I guess Florida has some things going for it, the Jimmy Buffet lifestyle that the weather affords is certainly one of them. I’d never get Sharaun to agree to moving onto a boat though, and I dunno how much I’d really want to “live” there either. Owell, cool to think about.
When I was a kid, I didn’t like to take any time away from playing with friends. I would spend as much time as I could enjoying myself, and didn’t like to get interrupted with other things I had to do. From this dislike of playtime stoppage, I developed a habit holding in my poops. Oh yeah, I totally said it. While I no longer hold my poops (in fact – I now revel in them, marking them not only as necessary but also totally enjoyable), I did for a few gradeschool years? I think about 3rd through 5th. When I was outside playing and I could feel nature calling, I’d simply ignore it. If it got really bad, I’d sit on the ground with my leg folded underneath me to help add some “you get back in there” pressure to my innards. Why I disliked the poopin’, I have no idea? I think I was just trying to save time or something. Why I’m writing about this, I also have no idea. Other than it might make me laugh one day when I get senile and can jog my memory by reading it.
Hmmm? talked about boats, check. Talked about poop, check. What else was it that I was supposed to talk about?
A friend at work is letting me borrow a machine that rips any video input source to MPEG video for the PC. You just plug in an S-video or RCA source, and it encodes and outputs MPEG video to your PC in real time. I wanted to borrow it so I can rip and archive a couple old VHS tapes I have. One of them is “A Day in the life of Dave,” a 24hr autobiographical documentary I made in high school, and the other is of a videotaped “fitness challenge” that my 5th grade class participated in. (Yes Shaine, you’re in there crab-walking with the rest of us). I know the idea of me in any kind of “challenge” seems an alien one, let alone the “fitness” kind? but I was in 5th grade and relatively un-ruined by Nintendo and potato chips at the time. Anyway, I’m gonna rip ’em and upload them to the web? as I do nearly everything.
Ahem… Dave. Is. Out.
Also written on this day...
- knowing is half the battle? - 2018
- nothing else for miles - 2010
- just wanted a burrito - 2009
- optioning tradition - 2008
- play-by-play hyperbolized-realism - 2007
- urine my prayers - 2004
I have seen the 24 hour Dave video and it makes the blair witch project film style look professional. It is still funny though
eric ain´t lyin´… that video will straight up make you puke.
Cool! I don´t remember a fitness challenge but I would LOVE to see it! But I DO remember Nintendo. I still suffer from a small case of Zelda fever. Let me know when you post it!
Oh yeah… I still hold my poop! 🙂
You really do have an obsession with the "womby" places, don´t you? And as for your lure to boats, and storms, braving the elements in addition to self-contained-spaces-thing, you should read Old Man and the Sea. An awesome book and best yet, no TROLLS!