Tuesday night, but tomorrow is my Friday – as Ben’s wedding sees me taking both Thursday and Friday off to do my groomsmenly duties. Can’t wait, should be awesome fun and drunk-relaxing to boot.
You know, a few months ago when I finally decided to add my e-mail address to the sidebar of sounds familiar, I wondered at first if anyone even noticed. Then, the mails trickled in. They were simple at first, although I got the occasional nugget. Over time though, I feel I’ve collected enough of these gems to assemble a choice little review. So, here we go friends, a rundown of what I feel are some of the best e-mails I’ve got as a result of my blog entries:
Did this really happen? (written in response to my poop entry)Why yes, it really did. My old college roommate at the time even confirmed it here. I assure you that I really did spend an afternoon cleaning feces off the floor, wall, and ceiling.
i like to be gay with u, and in some of ur blogs u sound like u might b ok with it?Sure! You’ve keenly picked up on the obvious homosexual undercurrents in my writing. Let’s meet sometime in real life and see if we get along. Maybe then, and only if you’re cute, can you be gay with me. I want to make it clear that, while I’m not 100% gay, e-mailing me random propositions is probably the best way to increase your odds.
Chinese people make me nervous, they always look like they will rob you. How can you relax there? (written in response, I think, to my entries on trips to Asia)Well, you’re right – Asian people certainly do come across all back-alley thug, don’t they?. But, you have to work through it if you want to really connect on a global scale. Look, I’ve been to Taiwan like, ten times, or something – and I’ve only been stabbed twice (and one of those was with a chopstick, so that doesn’t even really count). Plus if you’re able to conquer your fears, the Asian tail is saweeeet.
Your daughter and wife are beautiful, but your fat and your hair is thin.You have keen powers of perception, dear reader. I am indeed a bit oafish, and a good bit of my hair has gone the way of the dodo. I also agree heartily that my wife and daughter are some of God’s finest creations. However, I have a very logical explanation for it all: Panties shake loose in fits of laughter around me.
I can’t believe you think that fukken album is good, you must have retardness of the brain and cancer of the ear and a permanent shittaste in your mouth from all the shit you listen to. You are a dick idoit bitch. (written in response to this entry)Whoa, padner… slooow your roll here. What gives you the right to criticize my taste in music?! I have a blog, you idiot, and that makes me an expert on whatever I deem myself an expert of. I won’t let your negativity impact my genius, I just won’t.
I think I also have this allergy. Did you ever feel itchy in the shower after football? (written in response to this entry)Football? Shower?
do u go to mihs? i think i am who blew u in the field. (written in response to this entry)Wow, where to start on this one – this is probably my favorite one to date. First off, no, I didn’t go to “MIHS.” Second, I’m preeety sure you’re not the girl I was, uhhh, writing about. Your first clue should have been the fact that you seem to be writing about events which transpired relatively recently, while I, on the other hand, am writing about something which happened in my storied past. Wow.
You could do this much easier with real robots. (written in response to this entry)“Real” robots? Now why didn’t I think of that?
Brilliant! I showed this 2 my youth group that my stopid mom makes me go 2!! (written in response to this entry)Just what I need on St. Peter’s roll when I show up, spreading heresy to impressionable kids. Seriously though, don’t take anything you read on the internet as gospel. In fact, don’t even take the gospel as gospel – question everything and you’ll be better for it.
Lately, my el-cheapo Pioneer receiver has started to tick me off. Thing is, I don’t even do anything with it. I don’t have a CD player hooked up anymore, it’s up in a box in the garage with my record player. I simply don’t listen to anything at home that’s not the free XM feeds that come with DirecTV, piped off the iPod, or playing from my hard drive – no need for all that media (in fact, all my already ripped CDs went into bins and subsequently into the rafters in this past weekend’s organization fit). Anyway, for some reason the damn thing has taken to enabling only the right speaker more often than not. Oh, the other speakers are still functional, the test tone confirms this, but they just don’t work. I fear an internal circuit inside the budget box has gone lame. Certainly not an insurmountable problem, but the whole thing just makes me think I’m being told it’s time to upgrade the whole A/V solution… plus stupid Pat keeps talking about the falling prices of flatscreens…
Well, that was nice. As for the rest of the week, I think I’ve got something creative planned for Thursday and Friday’s posts – if it works. For more good stuff today, pop over and read this piece – it’s a good one.