a five year happening

The point in life where you’ve lost both of your parents is an important one.

This cord which has biologically tied me to my past; the physical forms – gone. Wheeled out and whisked away and never more tangible.

It seems a true end to a phase I wasn’t even aware I was in; a clear division in time; bookends to an epoch. A point where you are now truly on your own.

I’m realizing that the death of my parents, though two separate things in chronology, is really a single period of time in my life. A five-year happening. The death of my dad, our year-long sabbatical & subsequent life change, and the death of my mom. I can see it now for a single event; a complete evolution with a start and a middle and an end.

It stared with my realization that losing my dad, though I was prepared for it, impacted my life in ways I hadn’t been cognizant of. I’m convinced this event had bearing on changes to my attitude towards my career and my family. Under cover, not in the conscious open, my dad’s death worked in my mind. Losing dad changed everything, but it took me this long to recognize it.

Mom’s imminent passing will no doubt also drive change.


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